darkling

caution tape

tie my mouth closed with bright yellow caution tape

and i'll shut my eyes before i shut my heart, with your breath

i will escape.

let me choke on my on wordless chatter and break my hands

and get back your power.

Let your selfless words rain upon me after you send me into the dark

and take away my shoes so that I am paralyzed

in silence, entrapped where I thought I once could smell your heart.

light my feelings away with your white lighter and watch my essence burn away

into stale ashes with nothing more 

Blow them away into the starlit winds of when we met again that one day

because I am gone now with no more dust to prove to you there was once a yesterday

-mm

Darkness

I had a dream, which was not all a dream.

The bright sun was extinguish'd, and the stars

Did wander darkling in the eternal space,

Rayless, and pathless, and the icy earth

Swung blind and blackening in the moonless air;

Morn came and went--and came, and brought no day,

And men forgot their passions in the dread

Of this their desolation; and all hearts

Were chill'd into a selfish prayer for light:

And they did live by watchfires--and the thrones,

The palaces of crowned kings--the huts,

The habitations of all things which dwell,

Were burnt for beacons; cities were consum'd,

And men were gather'd round their blazing homes

To look once more into each other's face;

Happy were those who dwelt within the eye

Of the volcanos, and their mountain-torch:

A fearful hope was all the world contain'd;

Forests were set on fire--but hour by hour

They fell and faded--and the crackling trunks

Extinguish'd with a crash--and all was black.

The brows of men by the despairing light

Wore an unearthly aspect, as by fits

The flashes fell upon them; some lay down

And hid their eyes and wept; and some did rest

Their chins upon their clenched hands, and smil'd;

And others hurried to and fro, and fed

Their funeral piles with fuel, and look'd up

With mad disquietude on the dull sky,

The pall of a past world; and then again

With curses cast them down upon the dust,

And gnash'd their teeth and howl'd: the wild birds shriek'd

And, terrified, did flutter on the ground,

And flap their useless wings; the wildest brutes

Came tame and tremulous; and vipers crawl'd

And twin'd themselves among the multitude,

Hissing, but stingless--they were slain for food.

And War, which for a moment was no more,

Did glut himself again: a meal was bought

With blood, and each sate sullenly apart

Gorging himself in gloom: no love was left;

All earth was but one thought--and that was death

Immediate and inglorious; and the pang

Of famine fed upon all entrails--men

Died, and their bones were tombless as their flesh;

The meagre by the meagre were devour'd,

Even dogs assail'd their masters, all save one,

And he was faithful to a corse, and kept

The birds and beasts and famish'd men at bay,

Till hunger clung them, or the dropping dead

Lur'd their lank jaws; himself sought out no food,

But with a piteous and perpetual moan,

And a quick desolate cry, licking the hand

Which answer'd not with a caress--he died.

The crowd was famish'd by degrees; but two

Of an enormous city did survive,

And they were enemies: they met beside

The dying embers of an altar-place

Where had been heap'd a mass of holy things

For an unholy usage; they rak'd up,

And shivering scrap'd with their cold skeleton hands

The feeble ashes, and their feeble breath

Blew for a little life, and made a flame

Which was a mockery; then they lifted up

Their eyes as it grew lighter, and beheld

Each other's aspects--saw, and shriek'd, and died--

Even of their mutual hideousness they died,

Unknowing who he was upon whose brow

Famine had written Fiend. The world was void,

The populous and the powerful was a lump,

Seasonless, herbless, treeless, manless, lifeless--

A lump of death--a chaos of hard clay.

The rivers, lakes and ocean all stood still,

And nothing stirr'd within their silent depths;

Ships sailorless lay rotting on the sea,

And their masts fell down piecemeal: as they dropp'd

They slept on the abyss without a surge--

The waves were dead; the tides were in their grave,

The moon, their mistress, had expir'd before;

The winds were wither'd in the stagnant air,

And the clouds perish'd; Darkness had no need

Of aid from them--She was the Universe.

-Lord Byron

I know this one is really long, old, romantic, and full of almost an overwhelming amount of descriptions but, I read this today in a book store and then it started to rain and then everything kind of fell apart in the span of ten minutes. And I was almost brought to tears because of this poem's intensity and desperation. It is worth reading especially, if it is raining where you are right now or you are sad for any reason.

watch love melt.

i wish that i could run away,

away from the dark night,

and unite with the pink sky and sing with  the sunset, 

before she dies along the charcoal sky dripping with saddened stars

to scare away the storm and his melting bullets drenching us with memories i cannot forget

cursing away the deceptive dream filled clouds whose foreign blue, left only black scars

I want to just escape with the sun, watch it melt into the sea doubt,

and I'd jump right before we fall

and I'd make it to the light before darkness tyrannizes the color before love's drought.

take me to the night again where are names are written in the clouds

let me see it just once more before it drops and crumbles

back into misery's cold abyss

of everlasting nothingness.

Just  remind me to go down with sun

for in luminated darkness

I am defenseless to that familiar tide as you suck me back into to where this once begun

Once again.

-mm

poison ivy, please come back

i like watching the raindrops fall onto the ground

each one like a black diamond shattering into forgotten 

pieces of life's stolen joy, a stolen memory, a moment without sound.

Droplets of life, almost invisible, carrying everything you are to me

every evaporated tear falling into the same puddle of all of the world's sadness, 

every ressurected night and sunken sunrise and every missed oppetunity

grew with the young green trees in the dark

who will never let me forget these ivy tainted memories

while I watch the rain cross out and then re-write  our names into fallen pieces of bark.

every moment of joy like a blossoming flower so sweet, I cannot decline

but like each of the seasons end, after the storm you are never mine

-mm

If I know what the end is like, why can't I find the new beginning?